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How Guiltless Sex is Possible

(Choose one)

a) To be totally inebriated
b) To excise your conscience with a lobotomy
OR…
c) To:

  • Use your brain {Note: The brain does not work well when the body is sexually aroused. So, you use it before the party or even before you meet a potential partner!} Use your brain to decide your values, your ethics, your criteria for sexual intimacy. Inventory your conscience, comfort level with your body, your relationship experience, attitudes toward pleasure, purpose for having sex. Determine how you react to powerful labels, eg. “slut,” “virgin,” “hedonist,” “frigid.” Ask how others do their sexual decision-making and observe to see if the behavior is consistent. {Beware: A general statement of principal is not an ethic. Unless you have done the brainwork in advance, saying “I’m saving myself for marriage,” or “I am going to stay a virgin,” will rarely stick in sexually potent situations.}
  • Follow your heart.  Since you and your partner are more than bodies, are you treating one another as spiritual people having a physical experience? Is there mutual respect? Genuine trust? Compassion? Integrity? Honesty? The heart detects lies and duplicity, listen to its wisdom.

One final word of advice:
       Don’t settle for sex that is bad. Make it sex that is right.